I received an odd email at my inbox as webmistress for the Holy Moly website the other day. It looked like spam, but was crackpotty enough to warrant a second look:
Dear Sir/Madam,
I would like to draw your attention to a new interactive Christian support site which also includes absolute proof for Christianity. The proof is to be used for a peaceful global mass conversion to the true Christian faith.
www.churchalive.co.uk
Username: xxxxx
Password: xxxxx
The archived information is also available at www.worldends.co.uk (no password), which I hope will soon be available in many languages.
Grace be with you,
Alasdair
How could I resist such a kooky approach? Rather than clicking on the links, I Googled around for a while but didn’t find any other references. So I accessed the non-password site directly and had a look at some of the… very odd materials there, which are all apparently PDF files. Here’s what you’re hit with in the first paragraph of the second document, “Leaflet.” The first document is just a rather wacky pitch about buying hundreds of these leaflets and littering the planet with them, for “Safe, easy. Conversion.” The author, apparently named Alasdair, gets the ball rolling:
World Ends – Proof for Christianity
Evidence for God
John 13.6-8: “He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Are you going to wash my feet Lord?” Jesus answered him, “You do not understand what I am doing, but you will understand later.” He meant we would understand 2000 years later when the principal language of Christians would be English. He is washing the sole of Peter’s foot. If you do not allow Jesus to wash your soul, you are not his disciple. This means repent and get baptised into the faith. A foot also has a heel (i.e. heal the soul).
God is everywhere. There are many words in the English language that relate to Christianity, for example business, cash, medicine, cinema and Sunday (the sabbath Âread it as Sonday, also note that the Son is the spiritual light of the world, and the Sun is the physical light). Evolution, Evil you shun; Evil, Live (i.e. life is the opposite of evil); Devil, evil; Horoscope, horror scope; tarot, to rot; World, sword, worm, wood = Word; gnostic, agnostic; Faith, Earth; love, dove; Eve, evil; Adam, a damn; believe, be alive. See if you can spot any more!
Oh. My. GOD. How completely idiotic.
Somewhere in England, there is a little man committing mail fraud and littering the landscape with these badly written, worse conceived screeds. He must be found, taken gently by the hand, and led to the nearest mental health centre. And then his entire adult education will need to be repeated, with an emphasis on logic, entymology, and 🙄 modern web design.
Not that THIS site is an example of good web design, you understand.
Anyway, his arguments will certainly convince the 43% of the American public that still apparently believe that Saddam Hussein was linked to the 9/11 attacks and allied with Al Qaeda. This is in spite of the Senate Intelligence Commitee‘s findings, numerous news articles over the past 3 years or so, many books, PresiDuhnt Bush finally admitting it, Tony Snow dismissing it as “nothing new,” much punditry, lots of bloggery, and other information sources reporting the now well-established fact that SADDAM FRICKIN’ HUSSEIN and IRAQ had NOTHING to DO with FRICKIN’ NINE ONE ONE.
If people are stupid enough to believe that, they’re certainly stupid enough to believe “Alisdair’s” idiotic “proof of Christianity.” And that makes me more than a little worried.
