So. Off into the blue tomorrow on a fact-finding trip. It’s just a short weekend trip on my own – my husband David and my cat Riley will be batching it while I’m gadding around the urban wilderness of Salt Lake.
Books and Stuff To Read
- Another Country
- Sudoku Easy by Will Shortz
- Large type copies of several Sudoku puzzles
- Moleskine notebook (or knockoff of same)((nearly full)
- Moleskine notebook (the real thing)((empty))
- Pens, pencils, highlighter
- Deciding whether to bring more books
Techery
- Laptop
- Case Logic case
- Wireless mouse (I know, but it’s so damn handy)
- AC/DC adapter
- phone cable for occasional dialup access
- compact flash adapter (will be able to put photos on laptop immediately)
- thumb drive
- iPod: clip, earphones, cable connection for power and updates
- Cell phone: charger, Bluetooth ear clip (still not used to using it, keep hitting “redial” for “off”)
- Camera: 1G flash card (not bringing anything other than whatever lens or filter is there)
Personal Junk
- Medications: prescriptions, OTC stuff, melatonin, band-aids
- Hair care, skin lotion in “hotel amenities” size: mostly from Napili Point and The Gonzo Inn
- Hair doodads, brush, sticks, barrette, etc.
- Travel toothbrush and paste, dental floss, etc.
- New specs: AUGH!!!! “Progressive lenses” my ass! They’re stealth trifocals. But they’re cool.
Clothes
- 1 pair jeans
- 1 pair convertible hiking/work pants
- 1 pair “dress” pants (actually extremely comfortable Lycra/cotton blend from Eddie Bauer)
- Various tops, light fleece jacket, layerable, etc.
- Sundries, socks, etc. (not that exciting, trust me)
- Sleepwear (the first pair of cute pjs I’ve ever had)
- 2 pairs shoes, one sporty, one outdoorsy, both comfortable
- Swimsuit and board shorts (my sister’s hot tub is awesome)
- Deciding whether to bring workout tights
- Deciding whether to bring sarong skirt and flip-flops
Obviously, it looks like a lot, but all the books and tech stuff and junk fit into my messenger bag, and the duffel carry-on won’t be tightly packed. I might throw in a carry-bag for bringing back extra stuff, in fact. I can’t really say why I’m bringing all the gear; mostly because I’ll be staying at Mom’s house, she goes to bed early, and I’ll have a few hours to kill before bedtime.
Once upon a time, it was my home, but it’s a lot smaller than it used to be, and is of a charming but inconvenient design. I love it very much, and cherish the memories that permeate the walls (thus improving the paint job). Mom loves it very, very, very much.
Family legend is clear: my wish for a “white upstairs house with a fireplace” when Pop was househunting in Salt Lake while Mom and I were still in Albuquerque resulted in Pop buying a house that looked perfect on the outside, but was most definitely not perfect on the inside.
For instance: it had a charming brick chimney. Pop never noticed there was no corresponding fireplace in the living room. The look on his face was as blank as the wall on moving day when Mom or I asked about the fireplace.
The kitchen was a nightmare – there was an odd little breakfast nook that was open between the kitchen and the “dining room,” which had actually started out life as a tiny garage. It had an inconveniently placed door to the end of the living room, which was the original dining room, but which had become a sort of library or study that gave access to the patio, which consisted of cracked hexagonal cement slabs.
The bathrooms had horrid green linoleum. This still survives on the floor of the little angled cubby in my old room. The rest was ruthlessly purged.
The walls were a pepto-bismolic pink. This went well with the horrid green lino. Mom saw pictures before Moving Day. Ultimatum: white walls or no move. Pop painted the walls. And painted the walls.
We moved in to the little white upstairs house without a fireplace in 1962. I was 5.
Mom transformed the house over the years. More painting, a refinished wood floor in the dining room courtesy of the monstrous belt sander she rented and ran herself, a remodeled kitchen with the door moved to allow better traffic flow, new appliances in better locations, and the nook transformed into a pass-through counter with stools on both sides and cupboards above and below. A green shag carpet that was a novelty (it had to be raked!) was replaced with a shorter carpet in a more neutral color. The old windows
came out and a big new bay window went into the living room, and Mom began collecting bits of colored glass and doodads that stick onto the window with clear plastic vacuum cups. They’re flowers and birds and little old-fashioned knick-knacks in leaded glass. Furniture came and went over time but was always comfy.
After Pop died, part of the insurance money went for our one real extravagance in those years: she found a little man who knew how to open up the wall and install a fireplace, where it obviously was meant to go, because the flue, firebox, ash dump, and other needful things were all there. He knew money was tight, so he threw himself into the spirit of things and scrounged for used brick and salvaged a big old wooden beam for a mantelpiece. Mom refinished it and rubbed linseed oil into the beam, and then added
brass cuphooks and hung some old English horsebrasses and bits and bobs of antique fireplace stuff in iron and copper. Cozy nights in front of the fireplace became a big part of the charm of being at home. New Year’s Eve became a tradition of building a big fire, watching the “New Years Eve In Old Vienna” with Walter Cronkite, and clapping along to the Marshal Radetzky March, then falling asleep in front of the fireplace.
Mom’s favorite room is the living room – she spends a lot of time checking out the world through her bay window. Her second favorite “room” is probably the deck in the summer, which replaced the old patio slabs about 20 years ago. It goes across the back of the house and is partly under cover. She’s got a bunch of hummingbird feeders and windchimes; when the weather is nice, she leaves the screen door to the deck open and just sits and listens.
It’s a cute house, and a sweet house, and an inconvenient house. But when visitors come for the first time, they come in the living room, look at the fireplace and the light streaming in from the bay window, colored by all those whimsical doo-dads, and the muscles in their faces relax. And they invariably say something like, “This is the homiest little house in the world.”
Well, would you want to leave the homiest little house in the world? No, I wouldn’t either. It may be possible to work with the impracticalities and adapt, overcome, and achieve a more comfortable and safe setting “in situ” for Mom. Have to see for myself.
There are a lot of products and possibilities out there; one idea that comes to mind is some sort of stair lift (David mentioned this tonight over dinner). And in Googling around, I see there are choices. Still, the name of this company gives me pause. Didn’t they used to make… tanks for the Nazis? Or was that some other Germanic company named Krupp? However, these
guys seem to have the right idea – through this network, local dealers sell and install either new or used stairlifts. Hmm. And then there’s the laundry problem… the basement steps are horrific; rickety, narrow and dark. But a combo apartment-sized washer/dryer could be installed upstairs in my old bedroom’s closet, which backs up to the plumbing wall of the upstairs bathroom. Venting wouldn’t be difficult. Hmmty hmm.
Yes, that’s what this is all about: choices, possibilities, and options for an elderly parent that won’t drive her middling-elderly daughtren and grandchildren nuts with worry. And being able to discuss these options without making her feel like she’s being railroaded to the old folks home. And helping her stay connected with friends and family, and not be isolated just because she can’t bat around town behind the wheel of her own car anymore.
Yeah. So, off tomorrow, back Sunday.
iTunes: Dennis Kamakahi: Aloha Ko’olau: ‘Ohana [4:28]
iTunes: Coldplay: Don’t Panic: Parachutes [2:16]
iTunes: Synergy Brass Quintet: If Ye Love Me, Keep My Commandments: Masterworks For Brass From The Baroque And Renaissance [2:17]
iTunes: Frederick Fennell & The Cleveland Symphonic Winds: Radetsky-Marsch for orchestra, Op. 228: Stars & Stripes [2:19]