Adam Felber’s got a new and improved State of the Union Drinking Game:
Fanatical Apathy – The 2006 State of the Union Drinking Game
The State of the Union Drinking Game (2006 edition) (enhanced!)
First of all, make sure everyone has a few pieces of scrap paper in front of them. These pieces of paper are called “The Fourth Amendment” and will be used during the game. Also, make sure that there is one fluffy and not-too-large pillow handy. Your Host begins with the pillow in his or her lap. This is the Crisis Pillow.The Rules
– Whenever the President says “evil,” everyone must raise their glass and take a drink. It’s good form to make a brief toast of sorts, something like “Down with evil!” or “Evil is bad!” “Evil” should be pronounced with a soft “i” [“Evihl”].
– When talking about the progress of the War in Iraq, wait for the President to say “We are winning” or “we will win.” Everyone then says “Yay!” raises a glass and drinks triumphantly. When the President says the words “hard work” or indicates that hard work still remains, everyone should say “Awww” and take a disappointed sip.…
– When talking about about Hurricane Katrina (or anything else, really…) the President may say “I take responsibility.” At this point, raise your glass, exclaim “Finally!” and bring the glass to your lips. Do not drink unless the President says something – anything – that indicates that “taking responsibility” means anything other than saying “I take responsibility.” As you wait, slowly lower the glass from your lips.
As noted, the above rule can apply to a variety of different situations. The lobbying scandal? Sure. Not having fired Karl Rove’s ass yet after promising to do so for outing Val Plame? Yeppers. Asleep at the switch when the merry military lads in charge of inserting positive news stories in Iraqi newspapers were doing their bit for outsourced propaganda? Uh huh.
Oh, it’s going to be an interesting night. Best have beer and blood pressure medicine handy. In the meantime, the Trib published an ad yesterday calling for people to make noise during the speech and “Drown Bush Out.” We’ll see.
