I read a recap of the TAR6 finale (which aired while we were in Maui) so I knew who won.
Feh.
Kris and Jon was robbed! Chicago, I hate you! You are not my city, and you never were. Oh, why is it that cities where I’ve lived or near where I live screw the teams I love and let the teams I hate win? Seattle, you screwed Ken and Gerard in TAR3, and now this. I’ve never lived in Phoenix and so I didn’t really care who won (TAR4, Chip and Reichen) and I can’t stand Dallas so naturally a team I really liked won there (TAR5, Chip and Kim).
Well, hell. Freddy and Kendra won. Damn models. One good thing about Chicago is Gino’s East, and the sight of Kendra gagging and belching really irked me. Their deep dish is to die for, especially with extra gollick and green olives (as stated here previously). But that was then (even though I just this moment finally watched the finale – I was just that “meh” about it since I knew Kris and Jon hadn’t won).That’s all in the past now, and at least Freddy deserved it. Kendra, not so much. Yes, she did actually say he was worthy of giving her children.
Bleah.
Models.
Thank God that’s over. And let’s hope no more of that excessive bunching crap like they had far too much of in TAR6!
CBS – The Amazing Race
But the good news, maybe, is that there apparently are NO models in the next edition of The Amazing Race, which will henceforth be known as TAR7. There hasn’t been a lot of time for edits, which was probably one reason why TAR6 seemed so flat after the awesome, picky editing of the incredible season that was TAR5 (that’s the “My ox is broken!” season, y’all).
This time out, the teams seem refreshingly normal and ordinary looking, with the exception of the stunt casting team du jour, “Boston” Rob and Ambuh (both alumni of different editions of Survivor. Meh).
So, we have:
Brothers, athletes – these guys are competitors, they’re physical, their stated goal is to travel and meet people. Not a lot of travel background. Some “industry” background for both – Brian is an actor as well as a bartender, Greg has some radio chops. The young male teams are always the ones to beat, so they’ve got game going in.
Best friends, seasoned travelers. They’re a teacher and photographer, respectively, and both have lived abroad. One has a strong background in Spanish and the other reportedly reads a lot of multicultural and classic literature. One of the unsung facts of Amazing Race is that quite often the tasks are culturally relevant or the locations are famous tourist destinations (the sort that show up in the better travel guides, or that have some literary or historical significance).
There’ve been a lot of cringeworthy moments for me watching TAR when people don’t have any idea what they’re looking for. Case in point, the clay warriors of Xi’an in the TAR6 finale. Not only did I know how to pronounce the name of the city, I have actually seen some of the warriors in a traveling exhibition. Granted, I still would not have a clue where to look in “Pit 1” for the route info.
Anyway, you never know when a little “useless” information gleaned from a lifetime reading back issues of National Geographic (or reading Don Quixote in the original Spanish, for example) might pay off.
Yay! A happy looking gay couple! They seem refreshingly normal. Alex’s dad didn’t know ’til the publicity blitz hit that his son was gay, so… hi, Alex’s dad! Good luck to your son! I hope you’re okay with all the news, but you probably already figured it out, right? Both are well traveled. Don’t know for sure but they don’t look as athletic as the brothers. Alex says he doesn’t handle stress well, and says Lynn is smart but lazy. Well, that either means screaming meltdowns and accusations about who’s pack is heavier… (I’m looking at you, Assterisk) or one guy has his shit wired and the other guy balances things out.
Okay, the pink bandanas are already bugging me, and I thought we said there were “no models” this time out. Well, one is a makeup artist and the other is something in the fashion industry. One is a mom and the other is not. One has an extreme phobia about flying – oh, please let there be skydiving! Please! And both are from California. That makes a LOT of teams so far from California. What is this? At least there’s nobody from Texass so far.
Limited traveling experience. They look like a couple of Stay-Pufs (that’s one of my old, old monikers for “sissy girls who can’t travel without hot rollers and a lighted makeup mirror”). I doubt they’ll make it as far as the last “glamour” team of females – which I think would be Tian and Jaree, who turned out to be unexpectedly capable. And they sure don’t look to go as far as the Bowling Moms.
They’re probably this season’s Team Geritaaawl (translation: cute, fit, spunky older couple who become fan favorites because of their great relationship). There’s no evidence that they could turn out to be another iteration of Team Asshat the First (that’s Teri and Ian, TAR3). However, the female half does admit to being “loud.”
Be that as it may, they’re both pretty fit (especially Meredith, who likely would’ve smoked the younguns in the swimming task in Hungary) and barring injury they may go far. However, they’re probably only good for maybe 3 or 4 legs before running out of steam, travel background notwithstanding.
May/December couple with a 17-year age difference. This may make this team more evenly balanced as far as strength and endurance than most male/female teams usually are. Both have a background in martial arts. She knows her way around a weight room, too – it’s nice that they’ve taken to casting physically strong women in the last few iterations, because it sucks watching a nice female team go down just because they don’t have the upper body strength. It also sucks watching the men do the physical Roadblocks and the women do the “piece-a-cake” ones.
“Boston” Rob and Ambuh. The Survivors. Meh.
I hate stunt casting.
Hey, guess what? You don’t have a week or more to lie around under a palm tree and plot strategery. This is traveling and thinking on the fly, dudes. You got to get your game face on if you’re going to compete (and not get sent packing like that awful woman they brought in that had been on Big Brother. What was her name? Oh, yeah. They were out second on TAR5, and deserved to go out first. Well, the Survivors might do all right; it depends on how good they are at working the airports and getting around in foreign cabs. Their only advantage is they’ll already be comfortable with cameras all over them.
Okay, who let this beauty queen in here? What about that “no models” rule? At least she’s refreshingly normal looking (and not a freaking Jaclyn Smith clone like half the women on TAR5 were, not to mention Kendra of TAR6).
He served in the military in Iraq and was captured, then rescued by the Marines. She has some sort of learning disability. I’m thinking she’s not going to be the team navigator, if it’s anything to do with reading. If he’s the kind of guy that has to do the driving AND navigating for the team, well, that won’t be anything we’ve seen before 🙄
Oh, my GOD! Who let these normal guys in here? A sub-contractor and a boiler tube salesman, of all things. Both very religious (possible name: Team Second Coming of Jebus (there was a TAR2 couple that were ministers who bagged the Team Jebus moniker).
Chuck is well-traveled and speaks fluent Portuguese, Ryan is not and speaks only English (with a drawl). Chuck is single, Ryan is married. Chuck spends a lot of his time with the youth of their church. Ryan thinks he ought to be married by now. Chuck has really long hair. They ought to be good for some colorful commentary once they get out into the world.
The first mother-son team in Race history. They look cute, but watch out. She describes herself as “demanding, and prepared.” He describes himself as “Machiavellian and strategic.”
And what’s this? He’s gay, too! OOOH, we’ll have to watch that boy and see that he doesn’t turn into a hussy-heartbreaker. Okay, maybe not – the gay team is in a committed relationship. But that won’t stop the “shipper” fans from speculating with wild gleams in their eyes, will it?
Wow! This is one gorgeous looking team. But what’s this? Yes, their lives are troubled. Both worked for famously bankrupt companies, they’ve been unable to have children and this is apparently a source of tension or stress.
It’s Uchenna who seems to be having a ball on the preview commercials – so maybe coming on the race does get them back in touch with their inner child (and with each other). But if they win, they plan to use some of the money for in-vitro fertilization.
Well, you know how I feel about that – so NOT what I would do with the money, but whatever floats your boat, honeys.
He seems fit and competitive; there’s not a lot said about how fit or active she might be. Not a good sign (example: Kim) but there’s now the “no more than 6 Roadblocks per teammate” rule to stop that nonsense.
I just watched a few – a few – of the behind the scenes videos of a few teams (only the ones I was curious about, though). And so far, my quick impressions in order:
Shut up, Megan. Let Heidi talk. Oh, wait, she’s annoying too. Shut up, Heidi. Shut up shut up shutup shuttUP! I couldn’t even listen to the second half. I couldn’t even listen all the way to the end of the FIRST half.
Lynn and Alex – well, they’re definitely “out.” Silly voices, but funny. They spend a lot of their time laughing and joking on their interview. They do pull the “people like us and we can manipulate them” card. Hello, it’s the male version of Tian and Jaree. They’ve already got nicknames for other teams from their two weeks in the pre-race sequester hotel – “The Hillbillies,” “The Republicans” (who?) “The Old People” “The Older Guy and the Younger Girl” “The Model Girls” (what? Damn! Models!), “The Brothers” and so on. I’m sort of wondering who “The Republicans” are – is that Ron and the Beauty Queen? At least their stated goal is to travel and have a good time. They might be the Sons of Cha, if they stick to their guns.
Ryan and Chuck – the Huckleberry Buddies. There’s your team name, y’all. Whoa, those are some thick accents on those good ol’ boys. Ryan calls his teammate “Charlie,” so that’s confusing. Interesting tidbit: you can hear an interviewer’s voice asking a question. They both admit they’re not real skinny, because they’re “meat n’ taters boys.” They’ve seen other teams and dismiss their competition as having “pretty boy gym muscles.” They also think they’ll get a lot of help from people. Pretty funny, but so corn-poney they might get annoying – or they could be really fun to watch as they react to the world. And holy crap – Chuck went on a mission trip to Peru… and the previews have their first destination as… Peru. Advantage Huckleberry Buddies for the first leg. Weird how that turns out.
Brian and Greg the brothers – a typically strong male team. But interestingly, the first thing they admit is that the lack of international travel is their weakness. Not bad looking, and they gots guns (or as Miss Alli likes to call them – Tokyo Stompers). Both look and sound like Val Kilmer. Funny like him, too. They’ll be following the pack and hoping to make alliances and help people out in return for favors. The HoYay “shippers” might be watching to see if Patrick starts following them around looking hopeful. Heh.
Ray and Deana – a kinder, gentler Jonathan and Victoria? Sounds suspiciously like it. He gots guns, too. All these guys with sleeveles shirts – is it a secret shout-out to Miss Alli?
Debbie and Bianca – they’ve got a hell of a background for the Race, it now seems – they’ve both backpacked all over Europe, and one of them went to Thailand for a while. They’ll probably deal pretty well. There may be some arguments (probably over which matching shirt they’ll wear). And they’d like to be the first all-female team to win it all. Well, they’ve got a lot of what it takes, and matching shirts, too.
Those were the only teams I wanted to watch pre-race. I’m trying to figure out if I have any pre-hate.
Oh, yeah – Megan and Heidi. Pretty hateworthy.
Pre-love? Mmm, hard to tell. Lynn and Alex seem pretty amusing, though.