Monthly Archives: January 2005

Busyness

Posted on by

You know things are going pear-shaped when there’s all kinds of stuff, nonsense, and news happening in my life, and I’m too damn busy to bother mentioning it here.

I read this last week but didn’t mention it before: ginmar’s unit is slowly making its way homeward. She mentioned that they’d reached Kuwait on some unspecified date, and on another unspecified date they’ll head Stateside. This is a very good thing.

Kevin Sites has added new posts and pictures documenting the tsunami and its aftermath, this time from Indonesia.

In the meantime, what have I got to say for myself? What’s my excuse? I can’t really say that “dinking around on the computer” qualifies as a valid pass for not having posted much or written much or blathered much (the reader may pick which best describes what goes on here).
Continue reading →

Welcome DSL Reports

Posted on by
Welcome DSL Reports

Yes, David and I attended the DSL Reports event at Dave and Busters and lived to tell the tale. Here the “Welcome DSL Reports” screen is clearly visible from the monitor in front of the restrooms, which made an odd kind of sense at the time. I won some coupons at some game, but then left my prizes behind. Actually, the noise and chaos and smoke (the whole place allows smoking) finally got to me in the end.

And why, why, why no pinball machines at a game arcade? That’s just crazy. Most of the games are these stupid quasi-gambling arcade games that don’t require skill and appear to be excellent trainers for future gamblers. I ended up playing a ball-drop game that required a certain amount of timing, force, and luck to pop a ball up and through a moving target or into scoring chutes. I felt pretty good until I got into the prize shop and realized how my 340 points counted for not much. And then some girl walked up with about 2200 points in coupons clutched in a huge bundle in her arms.

And of course, as soon as I ran through my designated $20.00, I spotted a game that actually looked like fun – Hyper Bowling.

Pirates of Pensacola

Posted on by
bookcover.jpg

Pirates of PensacolaThe first modern, major, general pirate book in a long time comes out April Fool’s Day. I have to get this pre-ordered later – we’re on our way out now. Pirates of Pensacola is also available to pre-order on Amazon. Anyone who’s anyone knows that it was actually written by Gus Openshaw, ex-revenge seeking former whale-killer journaler.

Currently, Gus is caught up in an entirely land-locked adventure, trying to get his writing stooge, Keith, rescued from some bad guys who kidnapped him, and also the only disk that contains Gus’ completed book. He kind of needs it back for the book thing to be a success.

Does that make sense? Of course not. Go back and read Gus’ blog from the beginning, and all the comments, and all the stuff at Gus’ alternate blog on Mindsay, and all the other peoples’ blogs at Mindsay, and all the other blogs that are somehow linked to Gus’s original and alternate blogs…

You’re right, it’s complicated. At least read Gus’ blog from the beginning.

Vicious, Freedom-Hating Terrorducks

Posted on by

Humorist Adam Felbers noted that at the recent commemoration of the 60th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz, Vice President Cheney represented this country by dressing for a winter duck hunt in Wyoming. All the other heads of state and dignitaries were wearing somber, dark overcoats suitable for wearing to funerals or other sad memorials.

Besides, if those high and mighty mucky-mucks had been suddenly attacked by a flock of particularly ornery ducks, only one amongst ’em would’ve been dressed appropriately to do anything about it. And then who’d be the “embarrassment?” Huh? Are vicious, freedom-hating terrorducks going to wait around while you drop flowers on your fancypants monuments before they shred your snobby overcoats with their deadly beaks of fury? I think not.

Mr Felbers may think that vicious, freedom-hating terrorducks are an amusing conceit, but he may be horrified to discover that they actually exist. He may actually say, “Holy crap! Those things are REAL?”

sinister-duck.jpg

Carter Oosterhouse Fans: Vote!

Posted on by

I ran across the following ad in the local newspaper, the Daily Herald:

Who’s your favorite handy heartthrob on TV?

Good-looking and handy? What a package.

In honor of Valentine’s Day, we are planning a just-for-fun story on carpenters who are also heartthrobs on reality television. We’re not talking beefcake or cheesecake, but looks are a definite part of the toolbox. Check out our nominees and imagine the projects the two of you could get done around the house.

Tell us who is your favorite and why. You can vote for one man and one woman online at www.dailyherald.com/homes/favoritehandyperson/ through Jan. 30.

oosterhouse.jpg

Oh, come on now! There are only three nominees each for male and female handyperson, and they don’t have Ty Pennington or that Eric guy from Clean Sweep? At least they have Amy Wynn Pastor, who is hot AND a great carpenter.

Since one of the biggest search terms in my stats is “carter oosterhouse shirtless” I thought as a public service to Carter fans I would pass along the link to this poll so they may vote early and often. And provide a nice photo, though this one come with T-shirt, tool belt, and friendly smile.

Honest, I don’t drool or anything, and unlike some of my cow-orkers who have signed pictures of Ty at there cubes, I don’t make a point of going all gushy for handy hearththrobs. If Carter were to drop by to fix “frozen toilet pipes” or take “pictures of frozen garage” (more search terms) or even patching the drywall around the freezeproof spigot in the garage, I’d love to get a picture of him and my husband scratching their heads and saying they have to go to Menard’s to get screws. Heh.

Fox Foxed

Posted on by

Thanks to Joey the Accordion Guy, those of us who don’t watch Faux News can enjoy the fun when one of their less-adept anchors tangles with a person of education, wit, and a sense of historical context. There’s video there, too.

In this case, that person would be Judy Quinn, contributing editor of Vanity Fair. She proceeds to take the air out of a hapless Faux News anchor in such a way that the anchor barely feels the needle slipping in and deflating her head. Can you spot it? I did!

Here’s the transcript:

Fox News: We were noticing all the snow in Washington, boy it’s really coming down! I hope that doesn’t put a crimp in anybody’s plans. Look at that gorgeous shot of the White House…

Judy: Well I, I have a feeling that maybe it should put a crimp, or at least something should put a crimp in the plans of the White House to have such a very lavish inaugural at a time of war.

Fox News: Really?

Judy: Yes. What I’ve noticed is the worse a war is going, the more lavish the inaugural festivities. When Franklin Delano Roosevelt was President, during a time of war, of course as you know*, he had a very modest inauguration and a very tiny party where he served chicken salad, or where chicken salad was served. And that was when we were winning a war.

Fox News: Right, but, well, no, I, look, I mean, the President has, has addressed this, hasn’t he, he said that this is a, I believe the quote was that we’re celebrating, we’re celebrating democracy, we’re celebrating a peaceful transfer of democracy. What’s wrong with doing that?

Judy: Have you noticed any peace or any transfer of democracy in Iraq? If you have, you’re the first person to have seen it.

Fox News: Well, I’ve noticed the elections coming up, and, to be honest…

Judy: They don’t seem very peaceful.

Fox News: ….I didn’t want to argue politics with you this morning.

Judy: Oh really? I thought I was allowed to talk about what I wanted to talk about.

Fox News: You certainly, you certainly have that right. Let me ask, let me ask you this: what, I mean, what — what should they have cut back on? I mean we…

Judy: How about $40 million.

Fox News: All right, well…

Judy: May I say something? May I say something?

Fox News: Sure.

Judy: We have soldiers who are incapable of protecting themselves in their Humvees in Iraq. They have to use bits of scrap metal in order to make their Humvees secure. Their Humvees are sitting ducks for bombs. And we have a president who’s using $40 million to have a party.

Fox News: What would you suggest for the inauguration? How would you do it?

Judy: How about a modest party? Just like FDR. I’m sure you’ll agree he was a pretty good President with a fine sense of what’s appropriate and what’s not. And during a time of war, 10 parties are not appropriate when your own soldiers are sitting ducks in very, very bad vehicles.

Fox News: Well, don’t you think that the President has, has given his proper respect to our troops? I mean yesterday, as far as I can tell, the festivities opened with a military gala, they ended with a prayer service. There does seem to have certainly been a tremendous effort over the past couple of days and more than that to honor our troops!

Judy: Well, gee, that prayer should sure keep them safe and warm in their flimsy vehicles in Iraq. I’d rather see that money going to them, rather than to a guy who already is President, for the second time.

Fox News: All right, well, Judy Bachrach, I think we’ve given you more than your time to give us your point of view this morning.

Judy: Thanks for having me on.

And thank you, Joey, for passing along that very enjoyable exchange. It was all so good, I had to quote the whole thing.

I can’t fail to note that when the Fox anchor was completely unable to engage Judy Bachrach on the facts, on the issues, or on the history of Presidential inaugural celebrations, she fell back on an old Fox/GOP standby, the snotty remark. This is most often seen when someone bravely takes the opportunity to exercise their right of free speech in a public arena, and a Party flack or an “objective” Faux News hack can only snark in reply.

After gabbling a bit doing the verbal equivalent of shuffling through the pages of a script in a fruitless attempt to get back “on message,” that is. At this point, note the random buzzwords and buzzphrases produced by said hack. Poor thing, she didn’t come off well, did she?

* Oooh!! PSSSSSSSSST!!!

Wackiness Factor

Posted on by

Yet another personality test, except with Wackiness!

Wackiness: 76/100
Rationality: 30/100
Constructiveness: 72/100
Leadership: 40/100

You are a WECF–Wacky Emotional Constructive Follower. This makes you a Candle burning at both ends.

You work until you drop, and you play until you can stand to work again. You have so much enthusiasm that you can find it hard to control on your own, and you appreciate the guidance that channels your energy and lets you be your best.

In a relationship, you require lots of attention and support. You often over-contribute and end up feeling depleted and cheated. You may benefit from more time alone than you grant yourself.

Your driving force is the emotional support of others–especially affection. You can run on empty for miles if you have positive energy behind you. Without it–as it occasionally must run dry–you are depressive, listless, and difficult to motivate.

You need a lot of affection. Get it any way you can, but never at the cost of your self-respect or well-being.

Of the 80431 people who have taken this quiz since tracking began (8/17/2004), 7.6 % are this type.

Holy crap, this is pretty accurate. I took it earlier and didn’t weight a few answers heavily enough in one direction or another – it made me out to be some sort of Wacky Emotional Constructive Leader. No, no no, that can’t be right, I’m no leader. So a few more intellectually honest clicks and here I am.

David will agree about the “candle burning at both ends” part.

Inconspicuous Giant Rat In A Dress

Posted on by
catvacuum.jpg

Boing Boing: Disguise your vacuum cleaner as an (inconspicous) giant rat in gingham

In spite of our conversation last night about much-mourned pets, I don’t think the answer is getting a giant rat or cat or bunny costume for the vacuum cleaner. Or bear, for that matter. I think BoingBoing confused the cat with the rat.

Apparently there’s a “maid” option available. I wonder if Leah would like that to go with Rhett, her poseable wooden butler that holds towels and wears seasonal outfits?

Amazingly OutRaced

Posted on by

I’ve been so busy lately I got out of the habit of checking TWOP for new recaps.

So tonight I’ve got two to catch up on:

Amazing Race » Recaps & Extras » Season 6 Episode 8″ href=”http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=76&story=7325&limit=&sort=”>Television Without Pity » The Amazing Race » Recaps & Extras » Season 6 Episode 8

…in which Adam got in touch with his inner aquarium diver toy, but it was all ultimately a big wash because of lots of mega-bunching and ultimately a non-elimination.

And then we have

Amazing Race » Recaps & Extras » Season 6 Episode 9″ href=”http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/story.cgi?show=76&story=7355&limit=&sort=”>Television Without Pity » The Amazing Race » Recaps & Extras » Season 6 Episode 9

… in which our long international nightmare finally came to an end on a beautifully woven rug with the Amazing Race logo in Ethiopia.

She gripes most tellingly:

So to sum up, of the six episodes preceding the one you are about to watch, two resulted in eliminations. You want to know why the season is dragging like a Charlie Brown kite? That’s one place to start looking.

In the latter episode, there were several interesting things of note, which I think I already noted, but the best one is Jonathan and Victoria, you are the last team to check in.”

Miss Alli goes on to mention that she’s somewhat disappointed with the direction the show has taken:

Note to show: You fucked up. Don’t fuck up again. It’s not cute. It’s not funny. Stop telling yourselves it’s great TV. It’s MUCH less entertaining than Omarosa. It’s MUCH less entertaining than fucking Fairplay, and he was the biggest and boring-est shitheel in history. You made me no longer look forward to what was my favorite show for three years. I’m not a babe in the woods on this stuff, and I’ve tolerated plenty of assholes without complaint. But abusive husbands, whether verbally or physically or emotionally or all three, no matter how revolting the personalities of their wives, are OFF-LIMITS. ALWAYS. You dig? Good. Now I won’t have to say it YET AGAIN. On with the show; let’s have fun!

Now, from what I’ve read out of all the bits and pieces of news stories lately on the subject of Jonathan Baker and Victoria Fuller (Googlejuice), the CBS honchos were really unprepared for the huge amount of backlash and hatred that was going to be unleashed after this couple “broke” nationwide. A lot of people were calling for them to be disqualified when Jonathan pushed or shoved Victoria, but of course the race had already been finished months before. Then people were disgruntled that there seemed to be no consequences for this bad behavior the next week, and so on.

Then the news articles started surfacing that there were discussions between Race producers and Jonathan, and that he threatened to quit in Berlin or thereabouts. And of course right from the beginning of the season, we’ve been treated to quotes and comments on the couple’s website and in news articles – again, I thought that sort of thing was not allowed until after a team’s elimination or the end of the Race. But there’s been an awful lot of spinning going on nonetheless. But in any case, Jonathan and Victoria have been eliminated, so perhaps the furore will die down

God, I STILL love typing that.

Miss Alli’s been working up to the latter recap for about, well, 9 legs now. I’m going to savor it now instead of (ack!) remembering to take down the Christmas tree until just now. Again.

And tomorrow night, another new episode. I hope last week’s precedent is followed and a mean, sucky team is eliminated – perhaps Adam and Rebecca? Hayden and Aaron? No, Aaron’s funny, though Hayden needs to get up close and personal with about 3 rolls of duct tape. Freddy and Kendra, maybe. Freddy occasionally has flashes of humor or personality or spectacular soup-spewing abilities, but that doesn’t make up for the stuff that comes out of Kendra’s mouth.

Not Anytime Soon: Lagos

Posted on by

New York-Lagos, which would not have garnered my wager as a likely candidate for such a premiere, is considered a highly lucrative market. “Our Lagos service will be highly attractive to Nigerian and American transatlantic travelers,” said Continental CEO Larry Kellner in a statement. “Particularly executives in energy-related industries.” The route was previously covered by the long-embattled Nigeria Airways, which finally closed its doors in 2003.

Nigeria, by the way, was ranked the world’s third most corrupt nation by a watchdog organization called Transparency International. The group says 40 percent of the country’s petroleum income is stolen or squandered by government corruption and mismanagement. Allegedly — though I can’t confirm this — one of the reasons British Airways ceased its London-Lagos flights was because its airplanes were routinely stripped of equipment, including galley supplies, furnishings and even cockpit electronics, during layovers. Rumors say armed guards will accompany crew and passengers on Continental’s flights from Newark.

Although travel to Africa has been picking up for some of the accounts we handle, I don’t think any of them will be flying this route on Continental soon.

Or will they? They go where the money is.