Lifestyle guru Martha Stewart has been sentenced to five months in jail and five months of house arrest over charges of conspiracy and obstruction.

Excuse me, you misspelled “convicted felon Martha Stewart”. It’s the criminal version of winning an Oscar and getting to add “Academy Award(TM)winning” to your name in the billing of a new movie, if you’re an actor or actress who has been so honored by the Academy.

Hee hee – I wonder if the people she trampled in her rush to fame as America’s Lifestyle Guru are also savoring the piquant, yet satisfying mouthfeel of “convicted felon Martha Stewart”.

Repeatedly.