• Hot Off The Presses

    Halliburton Again

    The company declined an interview but suggests in an e-mail to NBC News that critics are politically motivated: “When Halliburton succeeds, Iraq progresses. Sadly, a few people don’t want either of those results.” Man, they use the same plays out of the playbook, but adapt! So cool! Such arrogant assholes! So Cheney-like in their masterful inactivity! Let me translate a bit for you: Critic=traitor whistleblowers=terrorists progress=we’re not the fall guys for Iraq’s problems anymore I suppose next they’re going to steal General Motors’ line about what’s good for Halliburton is good for the nation. How many days until the election?

  • Parish: Holy Moly (ECUSA)

    Churchgoers’ Checklist

    The instruction sheet circulated by the Bush-Cheney campaign to religious volunteers lists 22 “duties” to be performed by specific dates. By July 31, for example, volunteers are to “send your Church Directory to your State Bush-Cheney ’04 Headquarters or give [it] to a BC04 Field Rep” and “Talk to your Pastor about holding a Citizenship Sunday and Voter Registration Drive.” If anybody from Holy Moly sends our directory to the Repugnicans, there will be Hell. To. Pay. Our incoming vicar won’t be here until the first week in August, anyway, so we’re already behind. However, a Voter’s Registration drive may…

  • Hot Off The Presses

    UO Library Thief Sentenced

    A career thief who stole old books from the University of Oregon library and sold them on eBay sought leniency but got none Tuesday in Lane County Circuit Court. Well, I’ll have to have a chinwag with my old Oregon friend who’s now at the LC about this. According to the article, he devised an unsophisticated way to bypass the electronic sensors at the entrances. Let’s see… I’d guess that would be sling the book in a UO bookstore drawstring bag and chuck it out the nearest open window in the Reserve Reading Room, first floor northeast. If that’s too…

  • Good and Joyful Things

    Small Town Utah, Closed Mind Utah

    Herriman Mayor J. Lynn Crane balked at allowing a group opposing a proposed constitutional amendment banning gay marriage to pass out literature from a booth at the city’s founders day party last Saturday. But Crane’s decision may put the 5-year-old city on shaky legal ground Utahns – if you see a booth for Don’t Amend Alliance in Layton, Tooele, Park City or Torrey at your local 4th of July celebration, step up and say hello. And by the way, no they’re not recruiting. Sheesh. Disclaimer: My marriage continues to thrive no matter how many gay people manage to commit matrimony.…

  • Hot Off The Presses

    Homeland Insecurity

    A veteran federal agent assigned to O’Hare International Airport tried to extort $10,000 from an immigrant living illegally in the U.S. by threatening to have him deported, according to charges made public Wednesday. This makes me feel much safer. Because this is the only Federal employee on the take who’s tasked with guarding our borders, right? Right?